What’s Really Missing? Part Two
If only I had a romantic life.
Who hasn’t watched a romantic movie and thought that?
But Hollywood isn’t real life, and romance stories can never accurately portray the lifetime journey, commitment, and sacrifices of a lasting lifetime marriage relationship.
At the movies, in less than two hours, it appears that everything works into a perfectly crafted romantic relationship. The reality is, it takes a lifetime of growing, changing, and becoming one in marriage.
Don’t let a Hollywood portrayal make you feel something is missing in your marriage.
So, men need respect. What do women need?
Women need to feel esteemed.
We want to be the most valuable thing in a man’s life—ranked only after God. That’s why in marriage, if a woman discerns that hunting, or baseball, or cars, or motorcycles, or something else seems to take priority over her relationship, her husband is going to have problems.
Want to know something most people don’t know?
The law of sowing and reaping works in marriage, too.
Women: if you show respect for your husbands, they will rise to the occasion and lead your families. Sure, it might seem easier to take charge of your family, pay the bills, and make the big decisions, but I promise that you’re going to want a husband you can lean on and who can take care of you over the years. In order to have that, you have to allow your husband to become the leader he needs to be.
Don’t take his place, or even try to.
You might be able to step into his role for awhile, but eventually you and your family are going to need him to step up—and if you don’t let him fill those shoes now, he won’t know how when you need him to later.
Making mistakes is part of learning leadership. As women we shouldn’t pretend to know it all and criticize our husbands as they try to lead. Over the last thirty years our society has focused so much on encouraging women to lead that men have lost much of the confidence that was once a large part of their ego to protect women.
Remember that? It was called chivalry.
When we watch the old movies, we love the guy who took care of the lady and treated her as a lady. Thankfully, this has been restored in my marriage.
I’m not arguing against equality in pay or opportunities for women, but it’s sad that today’s women are worse off than ever in their relationship happiness.
Briefcases and boardrooms aren’t warm and loving.
Sure, I enjoy our business pursuits, but without my husband or family, they wouldn’t fulfill me!
I was recently playing with my granddaughters and grandson at the playground when three little Amish boys began to show me (and my granddaughters) all they could do—climbing, swinging high, and then swinging in a standing position with smiles from ear to ear. It was such a cute display of how strong a young man feels when women admire them (at whatever age).
Men want to perform for the respect and admiration of a woman, unless something has stolen their spark.
Whether it’s the emotional, financial, or communication skills to make a marriage work, or something else, most couples come into marriage missing something they need.
God can supply what you need and train you in your marriage.
If you and your spouse came into marriage missing a lot of things, or you let go of some things along the way—wisdom, maturity, humility, passion, communication—it’s not too late to ask God to bring that into your marriage.
It’s never too late.
